My ultimate confession

[Kloud]

Wow, asshole.

Seriously?  I'm not angry at them, I'm just not going to be like "everything is absolutely fine" like everybody else is.  We were lied to the whole time and I don't think that being disappointed should be considered an unrealistic reaction to it.  Sure, it's a shame we lost another member on the site (not that you ever post anyway, so why should even give a damn about that?) but I don't like it when people make a big show about leaving and I'd rather that if Miku wanted to leave, they didn't tell everybody they were lieing about who they were.  After being lied to on a scale for that many years, even if it isn't particularly surprising; I'm not going to be like "I fully trust you now." like some people do.  Nobody should expect me to trust everybody.  That doesn't make me an asshole.  Calling others assholes though certainly makes you something though.  You don't even go here, so what's it got to do with you? 

Whoa, you two. First, loomy. Don't go looking for a fight. You're free to say that you disagree with what he said, but just out and out name calling like that doesn't make you look like the better person in the situation. I'm just saying.

And Aryeh, I completely agree with you, it is realistic to feel disappointed or hell, even betrayed. In this situation, I wouldn't blame anyone for being upset. Even Miku/Sean was prepared for it. I don't know about everyone else, but I never said I fully trusted him after his confession- I chose to believe the confession, but if he had chosen to stay, yes, there'd have been that doubt. A deception like that does indeed make it difficult to offer your trust to the deceiver. So your feelings are completely valid.

I think that, more than trust, what people are trying to offer here (Kinfin and myself, at least), are acceptance for who he really is and a sense of peace before he leaves. That little, dying flame of kindness that, so often, has been found a pile of ashes in the world. I don't trust anybody, more than I can know for sure, but I'll be damned if I don't try and be that glimmer of kindness and hope in someone's life.

Ergh, it's hard to explain what I mean in words. In reality, it'd be as easy as a hug or a reassuring touch. What I'm saying is that I don't blame you for feeling how you do, and I think that most people here aren't offering their trust, but rather are trying to offer comfort and choosing to believe his confession in what must be a difficult and transformative time in his life.

[Scarlet Spider]

I'd be accepting.  If they were to come back right now as themselves, I'd be absolutely fine about it.  Although they don't seem to want to.  It's just I feel like I shouldn't reasonably be expected to trust them and act like they are totally innocent, when he did string us along for over five years.  That doesn't make me a bad person, it just makes me a person.  I'm not a fan of the whole big announcements about leaving thing, it's like people are trying to be dramatic; what I meant in my post was that if she wanted to leave, I would have preferred it if the lie was kept rather than being told about it. :/  Well what's done is done.

[Kloud]

I'd be accepting.  If they were to come back right now as themselves, I'd be absolutely fine about it.  Although they don't seem to want to.  It's just I feel like I shouldn't reasonably be expected to trust them and act like they are totally innocent, when he did string us along for over five years.  That doesn't make me a bad person, it just makes me a person.  I'm not a fan of the whole big announcements about leaving thing, it's like people are trying to be dramatic; what I meant in my post was that if she wanted to leave, I would have preferred it if the lie was kept rather than being told about it. :/  Well what's done is done.

Like I said, completely valid feeling. I wouldn't have minded that either. I guess I don't feel too strung along because I wasn't super close with Miku (hell, at times, she was a damn thorn in my side with her crude behavior)- but if I were, I can definitely relate (it honestly just makes me think of Unique and Cassandra *sigh* that was such a load of bull).

I don't think that he made this post and this confession for us. Not really. I think it was to help him move on and feel a sense of finality about it all- like, I don't think it was meant in drama, but rather as part of his healing and coming to accept things as himself. But like you said, what's done is done, and if he's gone, he's gone.

[Scarlet Spider]

Like I said, completely valid feeling. I wouldn't have minded that either. I guess I don't feel too strung along because I wasn't super close with Miku (hell, at times, she was a damn thorn in my side with her crude behavior)- but if I were, I can definitely relate (it honestly just makes me think of Unique and Cassandra *sigh* that was such a load of bull).

I don't think that he made this post and this confession for us. Not really. I think it was to help him move on and feel a sense of finality about it all- like, I don't think it was meant in drama, but rather as part of his healing and coming to accept things as himself. But like you said, what's done is done, and if he's gone, he's gone.

Yeah, I agree.  That makes sense.  I guess it was for them and I accept that; just not a fan of the swaths of dramatic leaving posts we've had over the years.  I wasn't too close with Miku either and honestly Miku always felt a lot like a character, so I'm not really upset about things because I'm not that affected because I'm not too surprised about the whole thing. 

And yes, Cassandra was very mean to everybody.  We've had a lot of crazy stuff over the years.  I don't know if you were there when Unique tried to make me pick between him and Orgo.  It was crazy because like Orgo was a nice guy who wouldn't make somebody pick.  Unique said that by saying picking was wrong, that I had already picked and so he left. ¬_¬

[DarkDragon]

To be perfectly honest, I agree with Aryeh here. I think we have every right to feel disappointed and betrayed, after all we've trusted Miku/Sean for 5 1/2 years now, only to be suddenly told that the entire persona was a lie?

I admit I'm not overly surprised, there were many inconsistencies with the story, but I can't help but feeling let down as I genuinely feel like a friend has departed, fake as they were, although I'm not really sure if I can believe anything they've said now.

I do not bare any ill will towards him, though, and I wish him the very best with his life and hope that he can use what he's learnt here to accept who he is and become a better person as a result of this.

I just wish that he was either honest from the start, or would stay so that we might learn about the REAL Miku and accept them as genuine friend, a REAL friend.

---

Sean, or Miku, if you ever read this, stay for a while. We'd all find getting to know you properly a pleasure, I am sure. But don't lie. You must understand that you've betrayed our trust for a number of years now, so I'm not sure if I can even believe this new story that you've presented. But if it is true, then good luck with wherever life takes you.

[fivex]

...wow.
I... really have almost no idea what to say about this.
Miku was one of the very few people I've ever considered a good friend.
I feel disappointed. Not betrayed, but merely disappointed.
...and almost kind of envious that he managed to deal with his severe depression in such an effective manner.

[Eric]

I...I am in the loss of words too. To think that Miku is not who I thought he was. To think that I used to have a short crush on her >///<

Anyways, hello everyone. I know, I have disappeared for god knows how long. I never intended to visit this site actually in the first place until Aryeh suddenly tagged me on facebook about some random advertisement xD and that... that actually made me think about all the memories I had with all of you since PPN and here. So, I decided to drop by as a guest at first. I read through some of the new posts at social network, then I saw this.

Miku, or Sean, I don't know if you will ever read this or not, but I just want to say that even though your entire persona is not what I thought it was, you're still a good friend to me in my heart. It's not the appearance that counts. It's not the gender or what you do, but what we have been through with each other. You're the one of the main reason why I stayed in PPN for a loong time.

 I know how you felt as I used to go online to escape reality too. I hated real life. For me, PPN were my remedy. That was why I was willing to stay up late into the night most of the time to chat with you all. Then... yeah, stuff happened. Some of our good friends moved on and we all lost contact with them. Though, I'm glad to see that alot of you still stayed here

I did not expect that you're asian too Sean. We are not much in difference then. I am 19, I am Asian, I live on the other side of the world where Starrk kept thinking it was in China. xD But yeah, I do miss you... I miss you all too. I'm sorry that I didn't go back here that much anymore. Life caught up on me. I am no longer in high school but in university now and life had gotten really, really busy. Though, one good thing is that I no longer hated real life like I used to. In fact, I am happy with what I have now despite the ups and downs. I hope it goes the same for all of you too

I'm sorry for the long post, but reading Sean's confession made me emotional... :/ I wish he would stay too so we can learn about the REAL Miku too and accept him as a REAL friend. But yeah... he left.

I don't know when would I come back to visit again, but I will some day. I'll try to stay here longer one day to catch up with you all, but for now, I am in university now and I have classes coming up >< So I am sorry that I couldn't stay for long...

It's really nice knowing you all though. Aryeh, Miku/Sean, Wes, Kloud Stark (intentional old joke is intentional). Zohaib, and everyone else. Even though we are oceans apart, I am really glad to have met you

Until next time.

[pride]

What a twist!

[Zohaib]

What a twist!

its like m night shamalyan directed ludicom

[Kloud]

its like m night shamalyan directed ludicom

Actually he did, PPN too. It was all an elaborate ruse!

lol.

[Magoo]

Actually he did, PPN too. It was all an elaborate ruse!

lol.

When's the DVD coming out?

[Zohaib]

When's the DVD coming out?

yesterday

[Silver]

Decided to check on the site on a whim, and was not very surprised to see this. I know this reply is late and will probably fall on deaf ears, but I hope Miku/Sean eventually reads it. Like everyone has said, PPN was a big part of a lot of our lives back in the day and I can understand why people would feel betrayed by having a "fake" friend, but here's my take on it: it was always you. Whether you identified as Miku or yourself is irrelevant. Miku is/was another facet of you, one that had its own life and personality, but is a part of a bigger whole. I distinctly remember you telling me things that I now know are true based on some of the things you've just revealed, so it wasn't all Miku - Sean is a part of Miku and vice-versa. I'm really glad you've accepted yourself and are making strides to better your life. I can relate to your struggles a lot, as you might be able to infer from what you know about me. I'm gonna message you on your Scarlet FB account in hopes of reaching you, if that account still exists. As corny as it is, I still love that you took my actual last name for FB, haha. I guess that's a testament to our friendship. If you don't wanna keep contact, I totally understand that, but I'm glad to have gotten to know such a personal part of you. You might think it wasn't genuine, but I think your real personality shines through whether you want it or not. Hope you read this someday, and I wish you all the best. Feel free to contact me whenever you want, even if that's another 5 years from now.<3

- Silver / Nelson

Edit - Almost forgot the purple font. I'm not Silver without the purple font.

[Miku the Fake Identity]

I read this thread today. It's the most meaningful thread I've ever read and I really want to thank everyone for their replies.

Thanks. <3

[Kinfin]

I read this thread today. It's the most meaningful thread I've ever read and I really want to thank everyone for their replies.

Thanks. <3

Of course. I don't know what you were expecting, but most folks around here are pretty accepting of almost anything.